Its that time of the year again when the Anna University exams come to haunt you and you're shit scared and in the desperation to actually study for the exams you end up doing nothing! this has been the case right from year one and now into the penultimate Sem things haven't changed much.
The order of the day was to take things slowly one at a time and probably to take things lightly not to bring lot of stress upon oneself so one tries to free one's thoughts and try and be calm & composed and ultimately results in too much of calmness and composedness. Now we all know too much of anything good for nothing and so the situation pretty much is self explanatory i guess.
So.. exams are around the corner and not much into preparation with fingers crossed like always and then that thought comes up " Evalavo Pathorkom idhu pakka mudiyadha? "
God bless and all the very best to all my friends taking up Anna University Semester exams!
Monday, November 15, 2010
Friday, July 23, 2010
3D !
Random Thoughts
Dilemma, Delusions, Dyslexia!
Giving up on addictions, resorting to new ones
Trying to be strong, pretending to be okay
Bringing on a fake smile, telling people its been a while
Shes been forgotten, yet shes around
Trying to be Optimistic,Dilemmas Galore!
Figuring out myself, my reflection in the mirror seems to be missing
So many regrets, such a waste of talent!
Longing for that perfect life, please define perfect
Delusions galore, its a living nightmare!
Wish i was Dyslexic, world would have been a whole lot different
Wish i was Dyslexic, World would have been really different
The world we've created, digging our own graveyards
Please embrace me mum, never again would i dare to leave you!
Hope its not too late, your fathomless love my only ray of hope!
A lesson so perfect, never again would i dare to dream!
Monday, May 31, 2010
Handicapped !!
There are times when people loose stuff, some of those stuffs don't matter much while some do.Of those stuffs, some might be precious and some might be Invaluable. The idea is to hold onto the invaluable stuffs just for the simple reason that they're invaluable.But i just lost two of the most invaluable things(non living stuffs).
They were so bloody invaluable to me that now i'm literally handicapped without them!
Both these were not really my fault. I'm not trying to justify here and yes seriously it was not really my fault that i lost those invaluables.
Though both were burgled out in totally different circumstances, i would like to present a the probability of the existence of a bad omen.. Maybe it was already planned that all this would have had to happen and so it did!
ok i know im whining too much but all this shit has left me handicapped and all im saying is Enough of this shit already! but some might argue that it could have been much worse than this and that i should be grateful which i always am but still, all am saying is Enough of this shit already!
It all began sometime ago, a month ago to be precise when someone flicked my mobile phone from the bag while i was writing the semester exam along with a brand new pen drive that i had won in a competition! Thankfully my wallet was intact and it had the money that was to land me home.
Then a few days later the encounter with drunk 'anti social' elements left me shattered( detailed description in my previous blog post)
And now my bike... is no more.. it got burgled out of Anna University campus' parking lot! It was there for sometime and then whoosh.... its gone.. that was the first time i had to go the glorious cops only to find out that they wont file an F.I.R unless you pay them... this i learnt the hard way after a lot struggle and persuasion.
But anyway now that i have the F.I.R my only hope is the insurance claim for the police inspector made it clear that they wont be able to find the bike for me as it would be impossible to do so once its stolen..
I just hope HE has better things in store for me for HE is making me learn things the tough way..
Thanks for reading!
Constructive Comments Appreciated!
They were so bloody invaluable to me that now i'm literally handicapped without them!
Both these were not really my fault. I'm not trying to justify here and yes seriously it was not really my fault that i lost those invaluables.
Though both were burgled out in totally different circumstances, i would like to present a the probability of the existence of a bad omen.. Maybe it was already planned that all this would have had to happen and so it did!
ok i know im whining too much but all this shit has left me handicapped and all im saying is Enough of this shit already! but some might argue that it could have been much worse than this and that i should be grateful which i always am but still, all am saying is Enough of this shit already!
It all began sometime ago, a month ago to be precise when someone flicked my mobile phone from the bag while i was writing the semester exam along with a brand new pen drive that i had won in a competition! Thankfully my wallet was intact and it had the money that was to land me home.
Then a few days later the encounter with drunk 'anti social' elements left me shattered( detailed description in my previous blog post)
And now my bike... is no more.. it got burgled out of Anna University campus' parking lot! It was there for sometime and then whoosh.... its gone.. that was the first time i had to go the glorious cops only to find out that they wont file an F.I.R unless you pay them... this i learnt the hard way after a lot struggle and persuasion.
But anyway now that i have the F.I.R my only hope is the insurance claim for the police inspector made it clear that they wont be able to find the bike for me as it would be impossible to do so once its stolen..
I just hope HE has better things in store for me for HE is making me learn things the tough way..
Thanks for reading!
Constructive Comments Appreciated!
Saturday, May 1, 2010
The Bashing!
Just got bashed by a group of miscreants near my area, few of whom were drunk!
It all began when one of them was standing in the middle of the road and i had cut through him and a part of my bike's mirror happened to touch him which made him call me by some name and i stopped to tell him that he was standing in the middle of the road and was not entirely my mistake.
During my conversation with him, one of them took away my bike key and returned it after i started behaving arrogantly and then my arrogance landed me into deeper shit and ultimately a gang of about 8-10 surrounded me and started bashing me on my head!
I could hardly do anything about it and i just wanted them to stop.
All i wanted to do during this period was to face them bravely which i did but in the end there was hardly any bravery left in me and whatever remained of my bravery helped me make a move when they finally decided to stop hitting me,hearing my shouts of- yen da addikrenge?(Why are you hitting me?) then one of them said 'vidunga da yaruneye teriyama yen adikrom?' ( lets just leave him )
Just when i was getting ready to move one of their members came on a bike and blocked my path but they felt they had taught a lesson already so they made him clear my way and i swiftly moved on..
Sad part was that the on goers and others were just having their free share of drama on the road and none of them bothered to do anything about it!
Even worse was when i narrated the event to my father and he said it was my fault that i stopped and had an argument with those kind of people!
Not really sure whose fault it was.. i knew what i was doing was quite risky- taking on a gang of miscreants on the road but i really dont know how to assess what i did as to i have no clue whatsoever why i stopped!
I guess i should have just moved on ignoring the comment of the guy who stood in the middle of the road but i just stopped and in the end i got myself into lot of shit.
I could relate this incident to any national event that has occurred in the past.When will we ever learn? Will we be be mute spectators to everything that happens around us?
The feeling of revenge was the hardest to control, all through i was thinking of getting them to pay for what they did to me but ultimately i just decided to forget what happened if not forgive...
It all began when one of them was standing in the middle of the road and i had cut through him and a part of my bike's mirror happened to touch him which made him call me by some name and i stopped to tell him that he was standing in the middle of the road and was not entirely my mistake.
During my conversation with him, one of them took away my bike key and returned it after i started behaving arrogantly and then my arrogance landed me into deeper shit and ultimately a gang of about 8-10 surrounded me and started bashing me on my head!
I could hardly do anything about it and i just wanted them to stop.
All i wanted to do during this period was to face them bravely which i did but in the end there was hardly any bravery left in me and whatever remained of my bravery helped me make a move when they finally decided to stop hitting me,hearing my shouts of- yen da addikrenge?(Why are you hitting me?) then one of them said 'vidunga da yaruneye teriyama yen adikrom?' ( lets just leave him )
Just when i was getting ready to move one of their members came on a bike and blocked my path but they felt they had taught a lesson already so they made him clear my way and i swiftly moved on..
Sad part was that the on goers and others were just having their free share of drama on the road and none of them bothered to do anything about it!
Even worse was when i narrated the event to my father and he said it was my fault that i stopped and had an argument with those kind of people!
Not really sure whose fault it was.. i knew what i was doing was quite risky- taking on a gang of miscreants on the road but i really dont know how to assess what i did as to i have no clue whatsoever why i stopped!
I guess i should have just moved on ignoring the comment of the guy who stood in the middle of the road but i just stopped and in the end i got myself into lot of shit.
I could relate this incident to any national event that has occurred in the past.When will we ever learn? Will we be be mute spectators to everything that happens around us?
The feeling of revenge was the hardest to control, all through i was thinking of getting them to pay for what they did to me but ultimately i just decided to forget what happened if not forgive...
Friday, April 2, 2010
The Army Dude!
This is a true incident that happened recently at the bus stop with me.
So I met this old dude at the bus stop the other day who said he was 93 years old!
Seriously he did not look that old for the way he spoke or walked never gave me the impression he was that old!
Anyway, this person came up to me asking for alms and i gave him some money and hoped he would move on but he stayed. All of a sudden he spoke and said 'God bless you my Child' and I gave him a smile hoping he would walk away but he stayed and started a conversation by asking me what i did and other stuff any stranger might ask. So he gave me his hand and said 'My name is Y and I’m a retired professor you know, i did M.A in Literature'. then suddenly he said 'i was a neurologist know where to hit a person so as to give him a fatal blow!' that statement of his was quite intimidating!
Then he went on to tell me that he was in the Army and now i could smell his breath which was intoxicated. So i asked him “ are you drunk?” he said “yes I am drunk. I even have a bottle with me and he showed me the bottle he carried with him” it was like 4pm in the evening and this 93 year old ex army personnel was drunk and was trying to have a conversation with me!
So i asked him to step away and talk as i was irritated by his breath. he then asked me not to touch alcohol ever else i'd become enslaved to it! (Advice can come from anywhere, anyone, even from a stranger asking for alms!).He went on to tell me that it was nice of me to give him some money and he then asked me again what i was doing and if i was a student.
This part was recurring again and again, the ‘what do you do’ part. He seemed to have amnesia or something I guess.
The dude was drunk and he could hardly stand still and yet he could speak of all this!
i could not help but ask him 'are you ok? Will you manage?'
His reply was so convincing that i was assured that he was doing well. He said 'Of course my boy! Of course i am ok! My boy, I’ve been drinking from the past 75 years and this is an army man standing in front of you!' He got his right hand forward for a hand shake and asked me to feel his strength (and he felt pretty much strong for an old dude like him)
He told me that most of the youth today are weak and no way closer to what people of his age used to be during our age and i could not help but nod convincingly. He then said he could not move his left hand freely owing to a bullet wound and showed me a bullet wound below his chin.
Again he asked me what i did which i did share with him again and now i introduced myself as Abdul and he said his name was Y (Intentionally name kept private). He asked me if i was Muslim and when i said yes and it resulted in the following statement from the old dude- 'The Biryani you make on EID is the best!' this brought about a smile on my face. I thought- atleast someone's happy with something Muslims do!
He went on to tell me that he would get me a job in 'Royal Enfield' or maybe 'Ford' and that he knew people there! i was like 'thank you sir but i'd like to do that myself' and he said' I Really like you my boy!' and he went on to tell me his address! but he denied giving me his phone number which i did not ask for in the first place!
He cited a reason for not revealing his phone number-' there are some personal reasons for that’ he said.
Throughout our conversation he was asking me if he was talking any bull shit, if anything he spoke did not make sense and i had to agree that what he spoke made a lot of sense.
I was now able to notice many people at the bus stop staring at us. The conversation was now 25 minutes long and I was starting to feel uneasy..
He mentioned his address again and asked me if I would remember it and i read out the address to him just to prove I remembered his address. Now i felt it was high time i made a move and i said i had to leave as my bus had arrived, which was a lie.
It was one of those dreaded days when the bus you want to travel in never shows up! But i had to leave and i took the alternate bus and then changed to another from a different stop.
It was a really strange conversation at the end of which i felt that i did not treat the person like a stranger and now i wonder if he really wanted me to come visit him at his place...
I went on to share the incident with my mother and I wondered if she felt bad to know that I spoke to a stranger for she had once asked me not to talk to strangers! :D
So I met this old dude at the bus stop the other day who said he was 93 years old!
Seriously he did not look that old for the way he spoke or walked never gave me the impression he was that old!
Anyway, this person came up to me asking for alms and i gave him some money and hoped he would move on but he stayed. All of a sudden he spoke and said 'God bless you my Child' and I gave him a smile hoping he would walk away but he stayed and started a conversation by asking me what i did and other stuff any stranger might ask. So he gave me his hand and said 'My name is Y and I’m a retired professor you know, i did M.A in Literature'. then suddenly he said 'i was a neurologist know where to hit a person so as to give him a fatal blow!' that statement of his was quite intimidating!
Then he went on to tell me that he was in the Army and now i could smell his breath which was intoxicated. So i asked him “ are you drunk?” he said “yes I am drunk. I even have a bottle with me and he showed me the bottle he carried with him” it was like 4pm in the evening and this 93 year old ex army personnel was drunk and was trying to have a conversation with me!
So i asked him to step away and talk as i was irritated by his breath. he then asked me not to touch alcohol ever else i'd become enslaved to it! (Advice can come from anywhere, anyone, even from a stranger asking for alms!).He went on to tell me that it was nice of me to give him some money and he then asked me again what i was doing and if i was a student.
This part was recurring again and again, the ‘what do you do’ part. He seemed to have amnesia or something I guess.
The dude was drunk and he could hardly stand still and yet he could speak of all this!
i could not help but ask him 'are you ok? Will you manage?'
His reply was so convincing that i was assured that he was doing well. He said 'Of course my boy! Of course i am ok! My boy, I’ve been drinking from the past 75 years and this is an army man standing in front of you!' He got his right hand forward for a hand shake and asked me to feel his strength (and he felt pretty much strong for an old dude like him)
He told me that most of the youth today are weak and no way closer to what people of his age used to be during our age and i could not help but nod convincingly. He then said he could not move his left hand freely owing to a bullet wound and showed me a bullet wound below his chin.
Again he asked me what i did which i did share with him again and now i introduced myself as Abdul and he said his name was Y (Intentionally name kept private). He asked me if i was Muslim and when i said yes and it resulted in the following statement from the old dude- 'The Biryani you make on EID is the best!' this brought about a smile on my face. I thought- atleast someone's happy with something Muslims do!
He went on to tell me that he would get me a job in 'Royal Enfield' or maybe 'Ford' and that he knew people there! i was like 'thank you sir but i'd like to do that myself' and he said' I Really like you my boy!' and he went on to tell me his address! but he denied giving me his phone number which i did not ask for in the first place!
He cited a reason for not revealing his phone number-' there are some personal reasons for that’ he said.
Throughout our conversation he was asking me if he was talking any bull shit, if anything he spoke did not make sense and i had to agree that what he spoke made a lot of sense.
I was now able to notice many people at the bus stop staring at us. The conversation was now 25 minutes long and I was starting to feel uneasy..
He mentioned his address again and asked me if I would remember it and i read out the address to him just to prove I remembered his address. Now i felt it was high time i made a move and i said i had to leave as my bus had arrived, which was a lie.
It was one of those dreaded days when the bus you want to travel in never shows up! But i had to leave and i took the alternate bus and then changed to another from a different stop.
It was a really strange conversation at the end of which i felt that i did not treat the person like a stranger and now i wonder if he really wanted me to come visit him at his place...
I went on to share the incident with my mother and I wondered if she felt bad to know that I spoke to a stranger for she had once asked me not to talk to strangers! :D
Friday, February 12, 2010
India:Opportunities Within part 3!
We keep talking about creating more jobs, more opportunities and raising standards and what not but are we really working towards all that? Are we even trying to focus on the root issues? Are we open to accept all the shortcomings we have to put up with ?
Like they say, truth is always bitter and rightly i feel we still have a very long way to go..
The path to achieving our ultimate goals has always been hazy and when we get to see most of our nation's decisions taken by Orthodox people( old school ) one feels that those paths are now starting to develop cracks as well! so.. the hazy path together with cracks leads us to where?
Where do we even start?
The solution might lie in the setting and following of a 'Detour'...
Yes... new ideas are to be encouraged and the most prominent ones are to be addressed...
Anyway, the point i am stressing upon is the introduction of new radical ideas... ideas that would bring about 'Real Changes'. Ideas can come only when the proper environment for the support and growth of those ideas is set.
I'd like to term it as 'The Call For Upliftment'
The thought came to me when a friend of mine came to me asking for my thoughts on his project he was thinking of implementing...
The Project itself is very unique in nature that it could be termed as a radical idea!
The project is aimed at the upliftment of people, poor people as a whole. The theme and basis of the idea is very simple and if implemented and properly executed then it could bring about radical changes and result in the 'upliftment' of the society and hence 'upliftment' of the Country as a whole!
'The Call for Upliftment' is a call upon the student fraternity, it calls upon every student in every college to contribute to the 'call for upliftment' programme...
It is simple, it is precise and it is what the country needs...
We hear people speaking about abolishing poverty, providing homes for the homeless, etc ,etc but how do they plan to do it? do they even have a plan?
I just wish they would hear 'The Call for Upliftment' and hence be a part of this call... i just wish they recognize the uniqueness and importance of the 'Call for upliftment' and understand its development oriented nature and hence adopt it or atleast encourage it for they are the people with power...
If 'the call for upliftment' is in place and goes according to plans then radical changes can be brought about in the economy and prosperity of the nation and with the proper execution of the programme, a whole generation of people could be benefited...
The project might not bring about immediate , noticeable changes but it is sure to bring about a 'change' , a change every Indian wouldappreciate and respect...
Creating opportunities need not necessarily mean setting up of new I.T companies and allowing foreign firms to set up plants here in India hoping that they would generate new employment prospects rather it would mean empowering the nation with its own strength, its own precious resources- its own people... Making use of its own own people to empower itself and become a self sustained nation...
The Programme might sound absurd and might be ridiculed upon but its just in the process of growing in terms of baby steps and once its in place then the call will reach ALL ! It would and will be heard by the masses!!
Kudos to my friend Hemanth for coming up with the plan!
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Cant take this away from me!
If you go ask a professor ' what is that one thing which no one can ever take away from you', he'd probably answer- knowledge!
If you ask a guy who has had a breakup and has discovered this hidden talent of philosophy in him then he'd probably not agree with the professor's answer and have his own philosophical take on it! agree upon it or don't but its his philosophical take!
This post is about this guy who has had a break up and since then he has discovered so many hidden qualities in himself and one of them being the ability to express what he feels, to do what he really wants to and doing which he feels.. glad!
So, he has had a breakup and he feels that this has changed his outlook on life rather that incident has given him a new outlook on life! Things don't look the same to him, things don't mean the same to him, he does not take things for granted, he has learnt not to take things for granted and most importantly, people are never meant to be taken for granted!
He is often lost in Nostalgia longing for that someone with whom he used to cherish his days.He is often seen lost in some random thought and when asked what he was thinking he says- 'nothing'. Truth is, many a times he himself has no clue as to what he was thinking but that moment of peace with his own self was a very satisfying practise and so he used to do it often- loose himself in deep thoughts.
He was just like any other ordinary guy,living an extraordinarily boring life with not so many friends to be proud of and so leading a very useless life with no goals or aims what so ever but one day something happened. this something led to gigantic changes in this guy.That something was LOVE...
He fell in love for the time ever but he wasn't sure if it was love or mere lust.so he tried to convince himself saying that it was infatuation and that he should get back leading his 'extraordinarily boring life'.
FAST FORWARD:
The guy has had a break up and now he feels like as if he has learnt something.He is not sure as to what exactly he has learnt but this learning has brought about voluminous changes in him...
Yes he does get depressed and he feels like he's having the most horrific time of his life and he goes on to adopting seclusion as a companion and then weeps away his sorrows with no one to console him or make him. He does ask himself the same question any other guy who's had a break up would ask himself- ' could life be any worse? '
period
He recovers, recovery is something that was really difficult for him and he somehow made it through and now he feels... enlightened! he feels like he has learnt something that he never wanted nor wished to but that has given him Hope, hope to live every new day like its the last day of his life! hope to smile and make others smile! hope to survive and live life KING size!
this hope has given him the will to pursue his dreams and in the way to pursuing his dreams, he starts dreaming even more and then decides to follow his dreams....
I haven't really thought about that part yet:D ... so anyway this guy is now a different person and suppose you happen to ask him- 'whats the one thing that no one could ever take away from you ?' then he'd probably say- 'my memories'
Ironically this guy cherishes his memories of 'good' old days unlike any other broken heart romeo who would curse his past, time spent with his preconceived 'love of my life'.
Yes... the guy actually uses those memories as a source of strength and tries to live everyday with a memory that once made him smile... the difference now is that he does not smile but neither does he cry!
Our guy finds hope in his everyday life, small events begin to give him the strength to live every day to the fullest and cherish every day like never before.So the guy starts to think of all the time he had spent in getting to know his 'preconceived love of my life' and all the time spent with her and how he cared about nothing else in the world other than her.the world then seemed pretty small with just her in it! but now it feels like as if he is into a totally different time frame.Things aren't the same any more. the world has suddenly grown in size and he is able to see beyond what any normal person could see. He could see all the pain and misery inflicted by man, he could feel all the pain and misery inflicted by man. so what does he do now?
he does not stop and so he decides to make it a point of doing something about it.at that point of time he comes across a link on some site and registers himself with an NGO and since then he desperately awaits his turn to take part in the NGO's activities. he goes on to join this NGO that helps underprivileged kids and starts devoting his time for a good cause.
There was something that ignited this drastic change in the guy. there was this spark which lit from no where and now has left a huge mark in our guy.
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