Cant take this away from me!

If you go ask a professor ' what is that one thing which no one can ever take away from you', he'd probably answer- knowledge!

If you ask a guy who has had a breakup and has discovered this hidden talent of philosophy in him then he'd probably not agree with the professor's answer and have his own philosophical take on it! agree upon it or don't but its his philosophical take!

This post is about this guy who has had a break up and since then he has discovered so many hidden qualities in himself and one of them being the ability to express what he feels, to do what he really wants to and doing which he feels.. glad!

So, he has had a breakup and he feels that this has changed his outlook on life rather that incident has given him a new outlook on life! Things don't look the same to him, things don't mean the same to him, he does not take things for granted, he has learnt not to take things for granted and most importantly, people are never meant to be taken for granted!

He is often lost in Nostalgia longing for that someone with whom he used to cherish his days.He is often seen lost in some random thought and when asked what he was thinking he says- 'nothing'. Truth is, many a times he himself has no clue as to what he was thinking but that moment of peace with his own self was a very satisfying practise and so he used to do it often- loose himself in deep thoughts.

He was just like any other ordinary guy,living an extraordinarily boring life with not so many friends to be proud of and so leading a very useless life with no goals or aims what so ever but one day something happened. this something led to gigantic changes in this guy.That something was LOVE...

He fell in love for the time ever but he wasn't sure if it was love or mere lust.so he tried to convince himself saying that it was infatuation and that he should get back leading his 'extraordinarily boring life'.

FAST FORWARD:

The guy has had a break up and now he feels like as if he has learnt something.He is not sure as to what exactly he has learnt but this learning has brought about voluminous changes in him...

Yes he does get depressed and he feels like he's having the most horrific time of his life and he goes on to adopting seclusion as a companion and then weeps away his sorrows with no one to console him or make him. He does ask himself the same question any other guy who's had a break up would ask himself- ' could life be any worse? '

period

He recovers, recovery is something that was really difficult for him and he somehow made it through and now he feels... enlightened! he feels like he has learnt something that he never wanted nor wished to but that has given him Hope, hope to live every new day like its the last day of his life! hope to smile and make others smile! hope to survive and live life KING size!

this hope has given him the will to pursue his dreams and in the way to pursuing his dreams, he starts dreaming even more and then decides to follow his dreams....

I haven't really thought about that part yet:D ... so anyway this guy is now a different person and suppose you happen to ask him- 'whats the one thing that no one could ever take away from you ?' then he'd probably say- 'my memories'

Ironically this guy cherishes his memories of 'good' old days unlike any other broken heart romeo who would curse his past, time spent with his preconceived 'love of my life'.

Yes... the guy actually uses those memories as a source of strength and tries to live everyday with a memory that once made him smile... the difference now is that he does not smile but neither does he cry!

Our guy finds hope in his everyday life, small events begin to give him the strength to live every day to the fullest and cherish every day like never before.So the guy starts to think of all the time he had spent in getting to know his 'preconceived love of my life' and all the time spent with her and how he cared about nothing else in the world other than her.the world then seemed pretty small with just her in it! but now it feels like as if he is into a totally different time frame.Things aren't the same any more. the world has suddenly grown in size and he is able to see beyond what any normal person could see. He could see all the pain and misery inflicted by man, he could feel all the pain and misery inflicted by man. so what does he do now?

he does not stop and so he decides to make it a point of doing something about it.at that point of time he comes across a link on some site and registers himself with an NGO and since then he desperately awaits his turn to take part in the NGO's activities. he goes on to join this NGO that helps underprivileged kids and starts devoting his time for a good cause.

There was something that ignited this drastic change in the guy. there was this spark which lit from no where and now has left a huge mark in our guy.

India: Opportunities within -part2!

So i met my cousin the other day and he was telling me about this job interview he recently went through. He actually made it till the final round of a reputed company's interview but couldn't get the job so when i asked why he couldn't make it, he told me this is what happened

• The questions they asked him in the final round were too simple so he decided not to answer them
• He chose to be stubborn and replied saying -'i dont know'
• he also answered saying- i dont remember, i had it in my mind sometime ago but now i dont seem to remember
• they also told him that he would have the privilege to do his MS at the BITS Pilani yet he continued to maintain his 'i dont care' attitude

so thats how he got rejected and when i asked him why he did it, he said- ' i was not interested'

His friends on the other hand who failed to even make it through to the final round were so very mad at him that they would not even listen to his take on why he behaved that way!

Just like his friends i too was really furious at his reply and i was like 'OK so what are you interested in? what are you gonna do now?' then he said wanted to do MBA and he's already into preparing for those exams and all.

The manner in which he told he was going to do MBA was in itself so convincing that i was now glad that he wanted to do something he was interested in, something he really wanted to do. My fury was now subsiding and his justification though not totally right was at least meaningful in some way. This made me wonder how many of us do something because we don't get to do what we want to.

Many a times we are left with no option than to do something just for the sake of it rather than searching or waiting for something we really want to do but at that point of time if we really decide to do what we really want to then i guess there is no second choice to make!

Its quite a plight to know many of us doing something just for the sake of doing something or due to peer pressure.

The key i feel is to 'believe in oneself' especially when one is left with the faintest of hope.

I remember my Vice Principal telling us this story about Sir Winston Churchill after the war where he was invited to deliver a speech at a School to boost the morale of the students and this is what his speech was like "Never,ever,ever, ever, ever,ever,ever give in.Never give in.Never give in.Never give in." After saying this he sat down. So my point is one has to believe in oneself and one has to really figure out what one is most interested in and pursue that till the end! Opportunities will then just follow or rather form at every step one takes!

India:Opportunities within

There comes a point in everyone's life when one tends to imagine one's life after a span of say 5 or more years and imagine what sort of a life one would be leading. At that point of time one tends to look for those small leads that would ultimately fulfil one's desired idea of having a perfect life.

I've reached that particular point now where i have been literally forced to imagine how i would like to see my life bloom into in the years ahead. I've started to brood over all those opportunities I've missed out in the past and I've tried to console myself on the 'n' number of opportunities i might be blessed with in the near future.

So, i go about sharing my thoughts with my friends and getting to know their take on my point of view and some of them disagree on the 'n number of opportunities' part. I would have actually been satisfied with their take until recently when i got a chance to meet this Entrepreneur who had come to my college to deliver a lecture.

This was part of the E-Week being celebrated in my college and he was there on the launch of the E-Cell's website.so we were listening to his words of inspiration and we just happened to be there by chance. chance was when one professor walked into our class during a very very irritating lecture and i happened to be the second guy to raise a hand when asked for a volunteer to attend the programme by the E-Cell.

My purpose of mentioning this person is because he made me realize something many of us are too focused to miss out on! something many of us would not even think of due to a few lame reasons that we convince ourselves with!

The very reason he was there that day was because he chose to become an Entrepreneur , an option that many would not even dare to think of and he was there doing just what he had to do, break that jinx! Almost everyone has this phobia about doing something on our own as if its something that's forbidden, something 'not to be named'. His speech was mainly focused on how one should think beyond getting a mediocre job in some IT company and depending on the various incentives that one gets and imagining to earn even more in the future and finally labelling oneself as 'settled'. Is that really the way one would tag being 'settled' as?

Maybe it was the way i would have tagged 'being settled' as until that particular day.That day, he gave us the hope of 'creating opportunities' for oneself and building on those opportunities. Especially in a country like India with its overwhelming and ever growing population there is never a shortage of customers.This was the basic idea he gave us that is probably the answer to all the current global economic crisis.Hence the need and scope of entrepreneurship is ever growing.

I was at doubt if i could even think of venturing out as an entrepreneur and so i put forth a question and nevertheless i was clear at the end due to his proper justification.If there was one prime thing he made me understand that day then it would be to 'believe in myself' and many a times i forget to do that, i forget to motivate myself, i tend to succumb even before taking part in anything! That was something i have to overcome and his words were the proper start i needed.

Thus the key lies in 'creating opportunities' rather than 'searching for opportunities' and if one starts thinking the 'entrepreneur way' then there's no looking back!

What do i do?

What do i do when something unexpected has happened?

what do i do when something unwanted has happened?

ive been let go now but i know something serious awaits me

its just a matter of time before i face the consequence

its just a matter of time before i am brought to task

will justice be done? is there even any justice to be done?

i can feel my heart pounding now...

my pulse rate seems to have turned abnormal...

is this all really happenening to me or is it just a very bad dream?

i hope its the latter but i for sure know that its happening..

i just want this to end as soon as it can but will it even end?

if it will then will it not bring me misery and anguish?

i just want this to end...

P.S: just a random thought with regards to an event that happened..

A morning walk..

I was out for a morning walk today at the marina and things seemed to have changed quite drastically from what it used to be..

many things had changed... Once a haven for cricket freaks now bears a deserted look..

yes.. Cricket is banned on the marina now and i wonder where all those people have vanished?

I'm not a regular morning walker( laziness takes the better of me) and these changes were quite difficult to get to terms with.. i remember those days when me and my group of comrades( just referring to my friends) used to go early and reserve a spot for ourselves and how we continued playing cricket for hours and hours and now this...

The police patrolling has always been there but now it seems to be even more with lady police occupying their stand even after the others on cavalry have left!

one incident that happened today involved a speeding biker.. he was racing through at about 60kmph or so through the area where all the joggers and others walk through and immediately i could see some unrest among the police... As i was walking i heard a police constable inform someone over the walkie talkie to get hold of the guy and be very harsh with him! he was also instructing them not to let him go easily..

the guy must have been 18 or maybe 19 years old and was racing on a yellow Karizma.. how he got in in spite of all the police patrolling is quite surprising.. anyways he was caught and this i came to know when a angry morning walker was making his voice heard to a cavalry policeman...

after this i overheard at least three more conversations where the morning walkers were showing their anguish and disgust at the biker!

so.. that was that... another change one could easily note is the cleanliness of the pavement and the roads, the huge stones placed as a sign of some sort of fencing, the mosaic stairs, water sprinklers, the newly constructed-odd looking bus stops adjacent to the beach..

Marina swimming pool bearing a new look with a widened road in front of it...

i guess that's pretty much the changes i noticed..

oh yea in the end i noticed a pretty lady taking her dog around for walk.. damn... she was pretty!

oh yea the dog was a Labrador... and you thought i did not notice the dog?? :P ha ha!

I am not used to praising the Chennai police but when it comes to patrolling the marina in the mornings and providing a safe and sound environment for the morning walkers, i wont be exaggerating if i say 'Kudos' to them!

Never felt this way before!!

I've never felt this way before, i just wanna keep writing more and more

I've never felt this way before,thoughts seem to just pour and pour

'period'

I've never felt this way before,life is beginning to feel so sore

Ive never felt this way before,numbness seems to have filled me galore

I've never felt this way before, hope seems to take some sort of detour

I've never felt this way before, not sure if i could take it anymore!

I dont know why..

I dont why but i cant get any sleep now...

i wakeup in the middle of the night with a pounding heart only to realize i've been struck with a dart!

i dont know where these thoughts are coming from, never knew they were even there!

i wakeup in the middle of the night hoping it was all but a nightmare but then on realization i regret having woke up, i swear!

maybe i'd like to sleep for ever for i've crossed my miles and have no more to go!

maybe i'd like to sleep for ever for i've crossed my miles and have no more to go!

ir maybe you can wake me up and bid me goodbye before i go...

i dont know why i cant take you off my mind now and i dont know why i feel like i've just killed someone!

i dont know why but i cant get any sleep now...

time seems to have stopped and the heartbeats even harded and every beat reminds me im sinful!

every beat reminds me im sinful and i think you should know that im remorseful..

i think you should know that im remorseful..

is this not a pain big enough or do u wish to let me suffer even more? do u wish me to let me suffer even more?

you know i need your solace, you know i need your solace but i dont know why you seem to have forgotten that...

is it really true that people change in a matter of even seconds? is it really true?

as far as i know they seem to change only over the years,as far as i know they seem to change only over the years...

but i guess my sin made you change within seconds or maybe i dont know what made you abandon me...

i dont know why the heart is still pounding and i dont know if it would survive all this suffering!

i really dont know if it could survive all this pain and suffering!! :(